Fluctuation

My weight is a lot like a balloon. It blows up, then sometimes there is a release. Once, I lost almost 80 pounds and I felt great! Even though my body looked a little like a deflated balloon with the excess skin. Ha! I'd rather be carrying around excess skin than fat! Here's a look at how my weight has fluctuated so much:

COMING SOON

My Reason

I want to be around a long time for this guy. Those eyes. He looks like my Dad here. I miss Dad so much.
I don't want my boy to have to miss me too soon. I want to have the energy to do crazy fun, spontaneous activities with him. His first birthday party was SO amazing. I want to be throwing him parties forever.

Today

So I am doing this. Finally. I am going to lose this weight and share my journey with others. I want to blog as I drop the pounds. I am going to be happier than a bird with a french fry. Why is this the theme of my blog? Because I'm fat and unhappy about my weight. I'm not an unhappy person by any means. I love life and I love myself. I even love myself when I'm fat which is generally frowned upon. I think I've been making excuses for letting myself go. I love me for me. I know God and Jesus do, too. As do my family and true friends. Fatty parts and all. So I've sort of stopped caring as much about the way I look. That doesn't seem very fair to my husband and son. I don't want them to be embarrassed of me. I want to feel good when I look in the mirror. And I don't. Because I gave up. I decided to pour myself into others instead and I "get" why others care about their appearance but for me, the value has gotten lost. I just want to feel good and I need to stop settling for less when it comes to nutrition and the way I feel. I want to fuel my body and not in a Crossfit way. I just want to respect it. I seriously need to become happier than a bird with a french fry. This is my story. You're welcome to follow.